Browsing Category : Life

Melancholia

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  It is easy, when one is stupendously happy, to forget about the rest of the world, but from time to time the world has a tendency to intrude upon one’s happiness; a gentle but persistent reminder that there is a lot happening to everybody, and some of those everybodies are mine. The moon is big and bright and beautiful…

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Wonderful You

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People are noticing; they are talking about how I am becoming, evolving, growing, into myself; finding things I lost; remembering the person I used to be before I was gone, before I slipped into the abyss. Before I broke. When I would giggle too much and for no reason about everything and nothing, and when my eyes were constantly laughing because my soul…

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Not Just Pretty

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When I was a little girl, I wanted to be told I was pretty. I think it came from a place of not being quite sure; it came from a place of wanting to be told that I was more than I was, somehow. I’ve spoken in the past about growing up with a beautiful mother, and about the pressure I felt…

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The Fluid Nature of Friendship

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I was wiser in my twenties than I give myself credit for. In an old blog, in another time, I remember writing, at the tender age of twenty-two, that some friendships had use-by dates. Sadly, I didn’t remember my own advice, and I’ve struggled with the act of letting go all my life. It’s caused me nothing but heartache. I’ve…

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The Terror In Your Bones

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I can sense the terror in your bones. You had it all figured out. You made all the right decisions. You came out swinging, with every turn, because that’s who you were. You did all the right things. There isn’t a single person out there who could fault you, because your actions were faultless. And then, one day, while you…

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Puppy Love

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Three little puppies. Actually, I first noticed them because one of them wasn’t moving, although the other two were playing around her, frolicking about, and being generally joyful. I was in a small shop on the other side of the busy road, so I crossed over, and squatted down near the dirty brown bundle. She looked at me out of…

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Hello, 2014

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It’s been far too long. I haven’t written here for months and months, and I suppose I should write a little about how much I missed my blog, and how much I longed to be able to share myself with the world again, but the truth is, I didn’t. I mean, don’t get me wrong; I love my blog. I…

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Bubbles of Excitement

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I said something last week that I’m not particularly proud of. During a moment of self-pity when I was bemoaning the tragedy of my life (as I put it so eloquently during that particular moment), and complaining to one of my best friends that I was surely beset with misfortune as I had not yet managed to have a child…

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F.O.O.D

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Pista-chio. (Beautiful, expensive, rich.) I have a bag of these, and I don’t know what to do with them. That’s rare for me; it’s rare that I don’t know what to do with an ingredient. But when it comes to these I’m torn. Should I save them for Diwali and add them to a sweet, made with thickened milk, sugar,…

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Happy Anniversary, Blog.

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I logged in this evening to find a Happy Anniversary post from WordPress. I Speak Awanthi is two years old. I suppose I should have thrown my blog a party, as so many people seem to do, but the real honest truth of it is that I didn’t remember. Two years old. It’s funny; in the past, in older blogs,…

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