I was wiser in my twenties than I give myself credit for. In an old blog, in another time, I remember writing, at the tender age of twenty-two, that some friendships had use-by dates. Sadly, I didn’t remember my own advice, and I’ve struggled with the act of letting go all my life. It’s caused me nothing but heartache. I’ve…
I can sense the terror in your bones. You had it all figured out. You made all the right decisions. You came out swinging, with every turn, because that’s who you were. You did all the right things. There isn’t a single person out there who could fault you, because your actions were faultless. And then, one day, while you…
Three little puppies. Actually, I first noticed them because one of them wasn’t moving, although the other two were playing around her, frolicking about, and being generally joyful. I was in a small shop on the other side of the busy road, so I crossed over, and squatted down near the dirty brown bundle. She looked at me out of…
Last night I watched a very interesting documentary called ‘Shut up and sing‘. It covers the lives of the Dixie Chicks for three years after Natalie Maines publicly criticised the George W. Bush administration for going to war against Iraq. I was struck by the immense reactions to that one simple statement by members of the public and of the…
It’s been far too long. I haven’t written here for months and months, and I suppose I should write a little about how much I missed my blog, and how much I longed to be able to share myself with the world again, but the truth is, I didn’t. I mean, don’t get me wrong; I love my blog. I…
I said something last week that I’m not particularly proud of. During a moment of self-pity when I was bemoaning the tragedy of my life (as I put it so eloquently during that particular moment), and complaining to one of my best friends that I was surely beset with misfortune as I had not yet managed to have a child…
Pista-chio. (Beautiful, expensive, rich.) I have a bag of these, and I don’t know what to do with them. That’s rare for me; it’s rare that I don’t know what to do with an ingredient. But when it comes to these I’m torn. Should I save them for Diwali and add them to a sweet, made with thickened milk, sugar,…
I logged in this evening to find a Happy Anniversary post from WordPress. I Speak Awanthi is two years old. I suppose I should have thrown my blog a party, as so many people seem to do, but the real honest truth of it is that I didn’t remember. Two years old. It’s funny; in the past, in older blogs,…
Pity the daughters of beautiful women who by some twist of genetics do not end up looking like our gorgeous fashionable mothers, but looking more like ourselves instead. They will always be the yardsticks that we will never live up to, and many of us may spend our entire lives trying. People will be unkind and tell us that we…
I understand that searing desire to speak and to be heard. I have it too. As much as all of me yearns for proof and dismisses outright your beliefs for facts, there are times when I long for your faith. Things seem easier for you, somehow, and yet I know that faith in the unseen cannot be easy. Most of…